Life is about happiness
Controlling how you feel is a talent that everyone needs to develop in order to be happy and successful. What ever measure of happiness you have now is greatly dependent how well you have developed this skill. It is also the most valuable talent to own, if happiness is your goal…and it is.
It’s pretty easy to be happy and hopeful for the future when things are going well; you’re healthy; just got a raise or a promotion; or had the girl or boy of your dreams fall for you.
It’s quite another thing to feel great when you just lost a job; just received the wrath of a boss; had a serious injury or disease; or the boy or girl of your dreams just dumped you.
So, the question to ask yourself is, “am I happy because of what happens to me, or am I happy because I choose to be?” Continue reading
Helping others to their own success
Story #1. I gave David, the board member, several ideas privately on how he could improve the new business strategy of the startup. I expected him to go directly to the CEO and explain these to him. To my pleasant surprise he made all the suggestions in an email and attributed all the ideas to me, thus giving me full credit for them. My respect for him increased exponentially. I will always be willing to help David.
She was fairly attractive and very engaged in the project, but every time you spoke to her, you had to mentally dodge garbage coming from her mouth. Simply speaking about an upcoming launch of an Intranet project meant that you had to deal with injections of references to the sex act, as well as her other litany of repeated oral puss. How did she think that fit into the context of this project. Its not like it happened just once, this thing for her was a real habit.
I did not look forward to meetings with her, and she did periodically apologize for swearing, but the apology did not make up for it. I was always glad when the meetings with her were finally done. She was a burden on many levels. Continue reading
More on the outside than on the inside?
He was gregarious, funny, confident, understood what needed to be done and appeared to be a perfect leader candidate. His pre-show trailer was quite good, but once in the position the damage began. Confidently managing up was his best skill, and with brutality was how he confidently managed down. Everyone has seen this scenario play out; like going to a movie with a great trailer, but the actual movie is offensive.
In 2005 I received probably the best advice in my career. I was Director of Infrastructure at an International firm with offices worldwide. I was energetic and looking for opportunities. In February of that year I was called into the Global CFO’s office and offered the Global CIO position from a man named Andre Pinto. Continue reading
Learning to like people who are difficult to like is a skill you need to learn to become a great manager. If you want to have control and become a great manager here is one big step on the way. Continue reading
Nothing is more frustrating than a manager who is not a good listener. Like the manager who types on his computer off and on while meeting with you, or is working his IM as you talk to him. Multitasking while you talk to someone sends a really bad message; “your not worth my FULL attention!” Unfortunately, there are more and more of these types of managers. Society is also changing what is acceptable technology behavior, so it looks like there will be even more of them in the future.
Anyone can become a good, or even a great caring listener by practicing three basic skills and one “no no!” If you do, it will give you a big advantage. Continue reading